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So I bring you...


How I act like an #influencer in the bathroom 


On recent occasions it has been brought to my attention that perhaps I quite like skincare. I don’t know everything nor am I trained beyond the end of the internet but if they say it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at something I’m probably not far off.


Please read on if you like skincare or just me (hi mum!) 


DISCLAIMER: I am as Caucasian as one can be. I went off the pill 5 years ago and got full on cystic acne which I (almost) and nearly have control of but in life we have chocolate and wine so sue me. I also have rosacea which I’m 99% sure was made worse when I moved from Sydney to London at the same time as going off the pill but again I’m not a doctor so can only hypothesize with my seventh grade science skillz.


Below is everything I am using right now. If it seems extensive, some people have mindfulness apps and some people play tennis but I already had a bathroom so I went with that.



For the removement of my second favorite thing, make up..


Double cleansing is a real life legit thing. All the adults are doing it. I think it works.

  1. Reusable Remover Pads & NATIO Rosewater Micellar Cleansing Water:  I use these reusable wipes because it’s good for clearing one's conscience before applying all the below great things that are packaged in un-recyclable packaging*. Use them with whatever micellar water you think works. This shit is on your face for like zero moments so who cares what it is as long as it appears to clean. I like this because it smells like roses and I have time for that.


  1. Fresh Soy Face Cleanser or La Roche-Posay Effaclar Cleansing Gel: This is the real cleanse moment. I genuinely bought this in a duty free haze and don’t know why but it’s good and it works and I use it twice a day. If I ran out I would also use this La Roche-Posay cleanser which I make my husband use and when he doesn’t, he gets spots. Just saying. HOWEVER the Fresh is a ‘cleaner’ product so if you care about toxins/fragrance/stuff in general, stick to that.


  1. LUSH Ultrabland Cleanser: I feel bad about what I said about the environment earlier so for eco brownie points also known as conscience clearing I’d like to mention this fabulous product. I used it instead of a Micellar and it’s amazing and as we are being honest here I only stopped using it because you could only buy it from LUSH stores because that’s how fabulously environmentally friendly they are and sometimes I just couldn’t get there to restock. Sorry.



Because not all glycolics were created equal…


Every time I go to have a facial, speak to someone by some miscellaneous skincare counter in duty free or speak to anyone who knows anything about skin they will say I need to exfoliate regularly or more.. well that seemed counterintuitive to someone who has dry skin but do you know what, the people have spoken and they were correctomundo. In order for moisturises, serums, oils ETC to absorb fully you need to remove as much dirt and dead skin as possible. Make sense now? 


  1. Nip and Fab Glycolic Fix Scrub: The initial holy moly this thing called glycolic might do something came when I tried this. I like a scrub with a grain but usually I opt for those without microplastics… yes those beads are actually often plastic (WTF, I agree). However it deserves a mention because it’s a good entry level product at a good price point. Kylie Jenner uses the glycolic pads which are micro plastic free FYI but I haven’t tried them because I fear for my poor sensitive skin as I like a glycolic that I can also wash off but based on this I think I will try. 


  1. Clear Skincare Microdermabrasion Cream with Glycolic Acid: This is a very recent discovery and a full on I totally get why people love acids (lol) moment. This bad boy lets me use him everyday, doesn’t dry out my face and totally helped clear some pigmentation and looming deep-spots.


  1. Murad Hydro-Glow Aqua Peel: This stuff is gold dust and I know I know sheet masks are also terrible for the environment but it’s made from 100% cotton and I put it in my compost bin ok so I’m trying. It’s expensive so I don’t use them all the time but when I do my pores (if I am wearing my glasses and  can see them) look clear and my blemishes smaller. Plus it’s anti-ageing and I do get ID’d whenever I buy alcohol so maybe it’s working. 




Or masques if it’s Friday and you are drinking rosé.


  1. REN CLEAN SKINCARE Evercalm Ultra Comforting Rescue Mask: When you realize your skin is as sensitive as you at a year 7 disco in a bandana and Nivea pearl and shine lip balm, this is who you call. If you have rosacea, are trying to survive a northern hemisphere winter or have over applied the glycolic. Try this. It calms and moisturizes without making your skin oily. It will reduce redness and give you a glow. Even if my skin is just irritated from a breakout and I have pimps popping up everywhere I would lather myself in this.


  1. ZENMED Anti-Redness Mask for Rosacea Relief: If you really do have bad Rosacea buy this entire range and religiously use it. However if you, like me, kind of have it under control then get the mask. It has boring packaging and smells boring AF but a GP told me about it and I’ve used it for years so like toilet cleaner,  I don’t vibe with it’s necessary presence but I need it.


  1. SAND&SKY Australian Clay Mask & GLAMGLOW Super Mud Mask: For evening out tone and getting on top of breakouts - these two, for me seem to be the best and I alternate between buying the two. The GLAMGLOW can be a bit intense so if you haven’t experienced natural bliss of a face doused in chemically reproduced nature try the SAND&SKY first. For years I used Neutrogena Clear Pore Cleanser/Mask because it had a lot of kaolin clay in it but if you can become immune to a product I think I did and honestly it just doesn’t cut it any more. However, if you’ve never clay masked before, start there children.



In order of love.


  1. THE ORDINARY Hyaluronic Acid: if I use it, I think it’s boring and want something in funner packaging. If I stop using it; my skin hates me. Moral of the story is, we will be forever a couple: me and hyaluronic. I first heard about it when sharing a bathroom with my dear friend Tom on holiday in the south of France so when I think it’s boring I think of this poetic memory. He correctly informed me that just one gram of this stuff can hold up to six liters of water. Utter wizardry. Plus it’s cheap. 


  1. THE ORDINARY Niacinamide 10% + Zinc 1%: Have you heard of the world’s most gorgeous person? Well she is called @sophiapafitis and she swears by this. She told me to use this religiously but I groaned that the benefits it sings are for people with oily skin. It is also one of those products you have to use for almost 2 months to see any results which call me impatient but fuck that I want to look like Rosie Huntington Whitely NOW. But 2 months in, I have had significantly less of those nasty deep acne spots, you know the kind that loiter and are painful but never really come to the surface. So I rate it.


  1. GLOSSIER Super Glow: in the interest of transparency I was actually #gifted this BUT never has my skin ever looked this bright. The brightness is all down to the vitamin C of course but it layers so well with make up and doesn’t irritate my skin which btw vitamin C has a tendency to do so winner winner chicken dinner. 


Eye Cream

Apparently ageing is imminent.


  1. GLOSSIER Bubblewrap: also #gifted but is here because I genuinely use this everyday and genuinely gave zero f**ks about eye cream until I tried this. My godmother keeps telling me that eye cream is a surefire preventative for ageing but honestly I felt like it did nothing and just felt too extra, even for me. However, if I have had too many wines, slept terribly and woken up with drool all the way up to my eyeballs - this is a debuffing super queen. I honestly used to just put hyaluronic acid all the way into my eye area and think that this was a good multi-use product which it is, but this is better. It does have hyaluronic acid in it but it also has a bunch of other relatable millennial ingredients including avocado oil. Plus you can also use it on your lips and when I do they look plump as. 



Seal all that hard work in.


  1. Avene Revitalizing Nourishing Cream: about a year into my adult acne life, my skin looked so terribly irritated that it occured to this slightly tipsy, very tired Masters student that actually I might be making it worse by applying everything and anything that promised CLEAR SKIN to my face. I was starting to get some serious scarring and my face often actually hurt it was so red. So I stumbled into a Boots on my way home and bought a couple of products that had very few ingredients in them. This is the only one I still use daily as a night cream. I swear on first application it calmed my skin down so much, I actually looked dewy for the first time in a very long time the morning after.


  1. Weleda Skin Food: if my skin is DYING and by dying I mean, after having done all the above work, it still looks and feels as tough as a Sahara desert snake. Then this is the only cure, I don’t use it daily but I do use it as a barrier cream if I’m about to be outside in the British winter for a significant portion of time, occasionally as a night cream or for spot treatments. I know it feels counterintuitive to put a thick moisturiser on spots but when it comes to skincare, if it feels wrong. It’s probably right. I also bathe myself in it pre, during and post long haul flights. It works miracles. 


  1. Natio Rosewater Hydration Moisture Boost Day Cream: For a day cream, I look for something light that will seal in my serums but also give additional hydration. This is probably the one step in my skincare routine where I’m a bit of a Joey - super non-committal to any one thing. I always do this step, but don’t care so much what or who it is. Ya know? However currently I do like this. It’s light, smells like roses and helps keep my make up on my face. I’m not sure what more I could want but I don’t really love it. Wanna send me alternatives?



Don’t love them, don’t hate them either


  1. Aesop Damascan Rose Facial Oil: I only use this deep in the winter when my skin looks like it needs a hug. I also did not just buy it because it said ‘Rose’ in the title ok, I was given a sample and then graduated to purchase. I used to slather my whole face in it but now that I have so many other moisturising products I don’t need to be so extra with it and I just mix it with a moisturiser. Maybe only every now and then, but all the botanicals do make mee me glowy the day after.




If you’re going to do anything, make it this one!


  1. Mecca Cosmetica To Save Face SPF50+: This smells great. Adds radiance. Doesn’t make your make up slip or give you white face, which for an SPF 50 is baller. What more could you want? 


  1. Glossier Invisible Shield: This ones slightly different in that it’s a gel that feels like a serum and has a lower SPF (SPF 30) but if you don’t want the sheen, don’t live in Australia/care that sun damage is like super bad for signs of ageing/it’s winter, get this one. That all being said, it is f**king fantastic and now also UVA + UVB protective, it used to only be one of those things (can’t remember which soz get over it.)


Spot Treatment

How fun is adult acne?


  1. Dr. Dennis Gross Skincare Spotlite Blemish Reducer: Have you seen those super lol masks people wear that are all blue or red light and cover your whole face? Kind of look like a lightsaber for the face? Yes or no just so you know, they are obnoxiously expensive and I really want one. The blue light heels and the red light kills bacteria. Until I can justify such purchase I use the mini version as a spot treatment. It’s helped me overcome some dark times with cystic acne on my cheeks, the kind you literally can’t hide because it’s in that f**ked up place where highlighter and blush/bronzer meet so basically you can’t hide. ANYWAY, you hold it on the spot for 3 minutes, morning and night and it kills that bad boy, slowly but surely from the inside minimizing the swelling, redness, lifespan and then scarring. Buy one. 


  1. Kiehl’s Breakout Control Targeted Blemish Spot Treatment: For smaller spots this is good. It won’t kill the bastards overnight but it also won’t dry out your face like most spot treatments do. 



Extra Glow

Highlighter is overrated, glow from within is where it’s at


  1. Weleda Skin Food: I know. We’ve been here before but if you want a ‘natural’ highlighter or dewiness. Add this to your cheekbones. You’ll look bangin.


  1. Glossier Futuredew: If you are feeling even more extra then apply this, first to your cheekbones and then blend out. It smells great and I wear it nearly every day under my BB cream for extra-ness. Don’t know why it’s called glossier at this point, I refer to it as glowsier, seems both descriptive and easier to pronounce. Again #gifted but would and will buy.



Is this confusing as fuck? I hope not. Do I have too many products? Probs. But this is just a mere intro to a lifetime of exploration so please find below the following index also referred to as my order of application for an average day.



  1. Cleanse (only once - double cleansing is for the evening. So make it worth it. This is a Fresh Soy Cleanser or La Roche moment)

  2. Serums - Niacinamide followed by Super Glow. The acid + vitamin c brightness is what I need before coffee

  3. Eye Cream - speaking of coffee, fake it till you make it and apply now

  4. Moisturise - seal it all in with my nice smelling but nothing spesh Natio Moisturiser





  1. Cleanse 1 - Micellar moment

  2. Cleanse 2 - same as the am, usually Fresh Soy Cleanser

  3. Exfoliate - make sure everything is goooone

  4. Serums - hylaronic and niacinamide 

  5. Eye Cream - those crows feet aren’t getting smaller kiddo

  6. Moisturise - thicker cream time so Weleda Skin Food or Avene here

FYI I would mask every second night if I had the time so realistically we’re talking every third to fourth night… And I’d do it in place of exfoliating.


I had way too much fun doing this.



*I am in the process of swapping out anything unrecyclable however I need help. It’s hard and I feel small. If you know of any alternative send them my way. Also whilst we’re on the topic - but the app Think Dirty is great and helpful if you want to learn about harmful ingredients. 

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